What's the sitch with my long-term coffee thermos?
You know, we’ve been together quite a while now. How long has it been… three years or so? That was a simpler time. We were so young. Do you remember how we met? My roommate’s older brother introduced us when he left you on that table during a visit from the East Coast. I know you two were just friends, but I still feel strange about how quickly it became something more between us. Sometimes I wonder if he regrets bringing you over to my place that day.
The first fall was magical. We spent everyday together, sometimes from right after my morning alarm until well past dinner. At that point I was just realizing that I couldn’t do this alone; I needed you there with me. You make me a better man.
God, I thought you were so hot. And you still are! That’s really the amazing thing about you; the way you maintain temperature over long periods of time. Sometimes when I put my lip to yours it almost scalds me there’s so much heat. That’s how I know this is really special.
At the same time, you can be so cool! Just chilling out, for hours, ice cold. It’s incredible. You have such a broad skill set. That’s another reason I’m so attracted to you; you’re truly cosmopolitan.
I haven’t always treated you as well as I should. I know I forget about you sometimes, leaving you at home while I’m out on business. And I think you understand that there are others… Just know they are all one-time flings, they mean nothing to me. Flimsy cardboard shells; I don’t love them like I love you. They don’t have your shape or your sheen, your loyalty or your pedigree. I’m sorry. I know I’ve made some mistakes, and to be honest, I’ll probably make a few more. But please believe me when I say, you are the only one I care about.
My relationship with you has been the deepest and most intimate of my life. You challenge me to be a better spouse, a better friend, a better student, a better coworker. In all phases, I’m lucky to have you by my side. Here’s to the future, and to many more fruitful years together. You’re truly irreplaceable, Thermos-brand coffee mug.
*I have nothing to disclose with regards to the content of this sitch... Unfortunately, I'm not receiving any compensation from Thermos brand for this stirring display, despite the fact that it may happen to promote their merchandise. In fact, they asked me to please, refrain from writing love letters to their other products in the future.